Extreme tiredness X_X

I'm so super tired. Its been such a long time since I last sleep through the night. Not having enough sleep everyday. I feel like I'm wasting very fast. Feeling like my "battery" level is reaching the thin red line.

The night before, Yuxin kept waking up every 2 hour. Yesterday night, she woke up at 11.30pm fussing again. I was already super tired from the night before's torment. I latched her on, and placed her on bed as usual, thinking that she had fallen asleep. But she was so unsettled and started her fuss again. I latched her again, then placed her in yaolan this time thinking it might help her settle down since I am so super tired to coax her. But she kept fussing and crying. And then I took her off yaolan and tried rocking her to sleep. But she kept struggling as I carried her. This continued for 1 hour and she was still not asleep yet. I was so tired and frustrated. Hubby was outside with his campmates, I called him, no one picked up. I redialled and redialled, I think more than 10 times and when he finally picked up the phone, I wanted so much to tell him I was so super tired trying to make baby sleep. But instead I asked him what time he'll be coming back, baby is notti, only to get a reply "I'm coming back soon". Soon? How soon? Half and hour? One hour?

I cried after I hanged up. Frustrated and tired. I cried to Yuxin, asked her to sleep as mummy is tired. She looked at me in the dark, as if understanding me, I carried her in my arms on the bed and she finally fell asleep at around 1am. Hubby was back in time... after all the ordeal...

I have been doing quite a bit of online purchase. Online shopping seem to be a way of helping me destress. It somehow helped me not think of the tiredness in me, keep me awake in office and keep my spirit high while looking for good and useful buys.

I recently ordered an ergo carrier that many mummies raved about, despite that I have a Bjorn carrier. Total damage $177.50 including a sucking pad. Hubby will be away for a very long time in a few months' time, so I thought it will be better if I get a good carrier so I can bring Yuxin out alone and not get backache or shoulder ache when he's not around.

The thought of him not around for 4 months makes me doubly sian. Now I try to do everything myself so I'll get used to it when he's not around. Cleaning and washing up the toys during weekend, coaxing baby to sleep, etc. So I don't really mind when I'm busy with the cleaning, washing and coaxing while he's playing his online games. Sometimes when he offered to help on cleaning, I'll reject or rather him to play with Yuxin instead. He won't be around in another few months' time, won't have much time to bond with Yuxin and I'll be doing these myself anyway.

Sigh... All I want for birthday is sleep...

My baby is 2 month

Time flies, my baby is 2 month old already. And I'll be going back to work next month.

Kinda grown attached to the baby; seeing her smiling at me when I talk to her and her 可怜兮兮 look when she want somebody to carry her. She never fail to put a smile on my face everyday though she makes me angry at times with her nuisance crying, as I dunno what she wants.

Am kinda sad that she failed her hearing test on the right ear. Gotta do a detailed test next month to see what's exactly the problem =(

Here's a picture of her in 喜怒哀乐 look though her 哀 is not really very sad look la

I'm back

It's been a long time since I last log in. Been busy busy busy, tiring tiring tiring after I've gave birth on 14-Jan to my baby girl, Rainie; we prefer to call her by her chinese name, 雨芯 . Here's a sweet little pic of her at 6th week



I went for cesarean on 14-Jan coz Rainie was in breech position. I woke up at 4.30am to bath before going to the hospital since we're supposed to reach there around 6am. I was pushed to the operating theatre around 7.15am, waited outside the theatre for I think around 20mins. I felt calm and excited at the same time coz I'll be able to see my baby soon. Around 7.45am, I was pushed into the operating theatre. They started to put me on drip, insert catheter, administer epidural, draw a "curtain" in front of my chest to block the butchery view from me, and finally, asked hubby into the theatre. Everything was bearable except for the side effect of the epidural coz I was shivering like crazy. A few minutes after the anesthetician administered the epidural, I started to shiver. Hubby thought I was nervous when he sat beside me coz I was shivering very hard as I held hubby's hand. After alot of shivering and teeth clattering, I heard a loud "woo-ehh... woo-ehh...", baby is out! Shortly, hubby carried the baby to my chest, I was still shivering like mad, but was glad that baby is finally out and looks so lovely. =D

I did confinement at my mum's house. Confinement was a torture coz I was only allowed to bath with herbs occassinally. The confinement food and longan red-date tea somehow made me kept perspiring. I couldnt get used to it and my head was so damn itchy. Fan was also a no-no coz wind will go into our body. I was down with a fever due to engorgement, lucky hubby was always there for me, helping me massage my breast with hot towel. Thank you hubby for being so understanding, supportive and always being there for me; helping, comforting and reassuring me. I'm glad that you're with me.

Hubby and me had to bring baby for blood test every 3 to 5 days due to jaundice. It finally went down to a low level after we gave her formula milk coz it was diagnose as milk jaundice. Phew...

Motherhood had been tiring but fulfiling. Tiring coz I have to express out the milk every few hourly and look after the attention-demanding baby. But seeing her growing up everyday and looking at her cute little face always bring a smile on me. All the tiredness are worth it.

Gotta log off now. Baby's feeding time. I'ver created a multiply account for my dear daughter http://rainieteo.multiply.com. Have a look at it if you're interested.

Ciao~